An open letter to my Ex who didn’t want to try

Hey Mimi, How are you, really?

It’s been exactly a month since I ended my relationship. It was tough, but looking back, I’m glad I made that choice. So, here I am, finally journaling about how I feel.

My relationship had more red flags than a carnival ground at night, and last month’s nonchalance was the main attraction. It felt like everything around me paused, demanding I face the reality I had been avoiding for too long.

Life works in funny, mysterious ways, doesn’t it? I was so determined to hold on to that feeling of falling in love. I truly believed I had found something special, something worth holding onto forever

Turned out to be a regret

There was something about him that felt reassuring, like he carried the same scars as I did. It made me believe we could build a world of our own, a place where our shared understanding could tune out the noise of the outside world. Every time I let my mind wander to the beauty of it all, my heart would flutter.

Our little world was all that mattered

Until I lost him the first time. He was gone. The guy who embraced me like i was his entire universe was gone. The guy who made me feel like everything would be okay was gone. The guy with the shyest, yet bright smile I’ve ever known was gone. Everything in my life reminded me of what I had lost. I couldn’t do life alone, not when I believed my soulmate was still out there. So, I went back to claim him.

And that’s when the regret set in

But can you blame a lover? But can you also claim someone who doesn’t want to be claimed?

I loved us too much to think love could fix us. And I didn’t want to fix us. I didn’t want to have to. I just wanted us to be “two humans” loving each other, without the weight of expectations or the mess we kept sweeping under the rug. But we couldn’t find our common ground. We couldn’t connect deeply, no matter how much we tried. We couldn’t love each other without feeling like we were constantly missing something essential.

Looking back now, I laugh. I take a deep breath and feel the freedom in my lungs. Because the truth about love is simple: Love isn’t supposed to be difficult. If it’s right, things fall into place.

Our world stopped making sense

---

Open letter:

You were my favorite person, at least while it lasted. I wished we could have been better, ended on a note that wasn’t so heavy with disappointment, but sometimes things don’t work out the way we hope. I realize now that we couldn’t find our way through, and that’s okay. Love, real love, requires understanding, compromise, and connection, and we just couldn’t reach that place together.

I don’t know if you care about what I’m saying, but I hope you learn something moving forward. I hope you realize that love isn’t just about being there. It’s about showing up for the other person in the way they need, not just in the way that’s easiest for you. It’s about effort, communication, consistency, respect. All the things I wish we had more of.

I was exhausted from being broken over and over. The arguments, the careless words, the patterns you knew hurt me but still kept repeating. They finally broke me. They did.

And to be honest, I don’t wish you well. Not anymore. This breakup has been too painful for that. I used to be the girl who sent well-wishes to every ex, hoping they found happiness. But I’m done with that, done with being the one left broken while they moved on.

So if you eventually stumble across this, and knowing you, you probably will, I want you to know this. I hold no bad blood. This isn’t about revenge or anger. It’s just how I’m coping with the pain. The curse of being a writer, I guess.

---

How am I doing?

I’m doing very well. I’m learning. I’m growing. And that’s more than enough for me right now. Thank you all for the love on my last post.

Until my pen flows again, please take care of yourself for me. How was your day, though?